Are You On The List?

Avril Field-Taylor is a talented lady, who, I am pleased to say, shares a writing group with me. A writer of crime fiction, historical crime fiction, Sherlock Holmes stories and much else, she is also a very accomplished singer. In celebration of Christmas, she devised the following ditty, based on the song, Behold, the Lord High Executioner, from the Mikado, sung by Ko-Ko. It scans even better when sung to that tune.

Avril’s Christmas offering to her Hornsea Writer colleagues – with apologies to Gilbert & Sullivan.

 

When the Orange Fiction prize requires authors to be found,

I’ve got a little list, I’ve got a little list,

Of the stalwart Hornsea Writers who on keyboards daily pound

And to whom all life is grist, to whom all life is grist.

There’s Karen’s Granny Beamish who can really mess your mind

By making you eat sprouts or something equally unkind.

While not forgetting Georgie, the dog whisperer supreme

And her gorgeous cohort, Matt, who’s every thinking woman’s dream

She’s a definite contender and she’s not to be dismissed

So just put her on the list, yes just put her on the list.

There’s Linda’s Torc of Moonlight, so diverse and quite complex

Whose characters are damaged but they’re always up for sex

They interact and squabble as their feelings they convey

With sultry scenes of passion so hot under the duvet.

Oh yes, Linda is a writing force, on that we must insist,

So she’s going on the list, yes, she’s going on the list.

Then we’ve Madeleine’s romances that will really touch your soul

In far flung places round the world from Europe to the pole

Her settings are so well drawn, to our chairs she keeps us glued

And ne’er by word or gesture are her people ever lewd

So for sweetness and decorum, we need one romanticist

And she’s going on the list, yes she’s going on the list.

And Penny’s Annie Raymond books are never ever dull

The stories all take place near here in Holderness and Hull

The pace grows bit by bit until the tension is extreme

And if someone interrupted you, you’d very likely scream.

She’s a master storyteller and her plots all have a twist,

So for that, she’s on the list, yes for that she’s on the list.

Not forgetting Stuart Aken, who can write with white hot heat

Complete a novel in a month, you know that’s no mean feat

His imagination knows no bounds and sometimes shocks occur

Ensuing mental visions make us all wince and go urrr.

But there’s no denying Stuart is a writing alchemist

So we’ll add him to the list, yes we’ll add him to the list.

An interview with Avril, the writer of these lyrics, can be accessed by clicking here.

And an interview with Karen can be read by clicking here.

My interview with Linda will be found by clicking here.

To read the interview with Madeleine, click here.

For the interview with Penny, click here.

And, for an interview with Stuart (yes, I know, that's me), click here.

Okay, so there's no picture of me, but, hell - the site's mine and I'm all over the place already!

My thanks to Avril for permission to use her piece of festive fun.

A very Merry Christmas and a staggeringly successful New Year to all of you.